You have been a year of clarity and growth. You reintroduced me to myself while also uncovering parts I’d never met. Parts that I’d never been brave enough to welcome or just fought so hard to avoid. You were a year of truth and revelation. A year of acceptance. Along with acceptance came the freedom to forgive, redirect, appreciate and even celebrate myself. Here are a few things that you’ve taught me:
- It is important to acknowledge self. Sometimes we wait around (whether conscious or unconscious) on others to recognize us in one way or another. We silently seek approval, pats on the back or just any show of appreciation. In the absence of, we began to question or doubt self. And get this! The acknowledgement you’re looking for from others, may never come! Tell yourself, “Job well done!” Congratulate yourself! Compliment and motivate your damn self! When you are able to do these things, everything you receive from others is just extra. Icing on the cake.
- Forgiving people does not mean that they deserve a place in your life. When people show you who they are, it’s up to you to decide whether or not they deserve a seat at your table. YOU choose YOUR tribe! And it should be made very clear that no seat has a lifetime guarantee. Act accordingly.
- You’re not a fucked up person if you say, “no.” In fact, saying “no” is healthy. No matter your desire, you can’t be there for everyone in every way. Additionally and MOST IMPORTANTLY, you need to make sure that you are there for yourself. This message is not just about monetary things. Time is something that we can not get back. All else is replaceable. Gifting yourself with time is crucial. Spend time taking care of YOU and then you’ll be able to take care of everyone else around you better.
- Trust the process and don’t rush things. What’s for you, is for you. Do your part. Control what you can and leave the rest to the universe.
- There is a boldness required for growth. You have to be bold enough to explore new territories. You have to audaciously place yourself in positions of discomfort, because it’s required for growth. There is no growth in comfort.
- Conformity and Ebony aren’t compatible. There is a rebellion in me that will no longer allow me to yield to societal norms just because its “the thing to do”. If it feels right, cool, but otherwise I’ve learned to honor my free spirit and go in whatever direction it leads me. As I’ve said in a few of my posts, I don’t fit in a box.
The above are just some of the things you’ve taught me, but in everything that I’ve learned, loving myself and all that embodies me, has been my greatest gift. Seeing myself as capable and deserving has been a life changer. There is no room for self doubt in this space. I’m so thankful for this. As I move forward into the new year, I will be taking these lessons along with me. I will remain open for new truths and self-discovery. Thank you 2018!
New Year’s Resolutions coming soon! Stay tuned!